Book 2
Chapter 5
Life in Valencia from 1946.
My Brothers Leave Home:
Soon after my father's death, one Fr. James Nazareth, offered to take my brother Evy, to the tea estates in the South. For some time he worked in the estates. From there he joined the South Indian Railway, and was stationed in Podanur a railway junction in present day Kerala. He learnt some English songs when he was there, and taught them to us. In those days, the landladies did not rent out their houses to bachelors. So, he told a white lie that his wife was expecting and in Mangalore with his mother, and he needed to work to look after his family, and he got the house accommodation he was looking for. The landlady became a good friend of his, and later he had to tell her the truth, when she had developed a rapport with her. She must have taught him the song called "Candle Light" which was a beautiful song. His best friends were two Malayalees: Shankaran and Shivadasan. He still keeps in touch with the latter. Evy might not have earned much, but on and off, my mother used to receive money orders from him.
Thomas Gonsalves , the brother of Uncle Basil Gonsalves, Rinny’s, and Tony's father, who was working for the Great Indian Peninsular Railway, took my brother Jossie, to Calcutta. He got his first job in May and Baker a pharmaceutical company, where Vivian Tellis, my mother's cousin was the General Manager and immediately started to send us Rs. 75 a month, and my mother managed the house quite nicely.
Valencia House.
In 1946, after our father's death, the land lady of the Jeppu house told us that she wanted the house back for her own use, and that we should find another accommodation. Perhaps she was afraid that we would not be able to pay the rent, as there was no other working member in the house.
My cousin Agnes Mascarenhas , the daughter of my Aunt Lucy, had some property in Valencia, close by to Jeppu. It used to be a handloom factory, and was made up of three parallel long rooms. The first hall was divided into two parts having four windows on the right side, three in front and one on the outer wall, and two windows in the smaller room in the front wall, and one on the outer wall. This brought in plenty of bright light into the hall. The left side was a room, perhaps used as an office, and on the right side was rest of the hall. We used the left side room for our studies, and the right part as our living room. The middle hall was used for dining, and sleeping. The long walls had two doors each, leading to the outer halls and two windows on either side of the narrow walls. The last hall was used as the kitchen, and a corner of it was turned into the bathing room. There were no windows on the outer wall, but one door leading to the back yard, and one narrow door close to the kitchen with no access to the outside. This was put up after the West Side wall had collapsed during the rains. It did not have a window. The toilet was outside the house. Cousin Agnes sold all these properties, and demolished this house some time, after we left the place in 1953.
We moved into this house sometime in 1946. The house rent was Rs. 15.00. My cousin’s brother-in-law, Mr. Ladislaus Gonsalves, collected the rent in law, Mr. Ladislaus Gonsalves, who used to live close to the Milagres Church, in Janes Court, where Cousin Agnes lives now. The backyard was sloping into a valley and then rising up. This was called the “big forest” or in konkani “vodlen rann” as it was like woodland. At the bottom of the valley there was a common well, away from the house. My mother had to draw water from the well and climb the steep way up to our house quite a number times carrying containers of water, which might have held about 2 or 3 gallons of water. Remember, she was a widowed at the age of 43, and did not have servants, and was 44 years old in 1946. There was no tap water in those days; so, all drinking water, and bath water had to be filled from the well. The round brass water container, tapered on top with a narrow neck to attach the loop of the rope, which used to be lead down on a pulley, was called "kolso". The water for bath was stored in a large, round brass vessel, called "bann". There was an open space under it to put lighted firewood during rain season and cold season, to heat the water. This part of the household chore was the hardest work. Our house was the first one as we entered the compound, about 200 feet from the road. There were two grocery shops on either side of the compound, alongside the road. The right side shop belonged to Mr. Gregory Menezes, whose son became a priest and the editor of the diocesan paper called “Rakno” (Guardian) much after we had left. At the time of our staying in Valencia, he must have been a baby. The left side shop belonged to Mr. Thomas Noronha, who had timber business.
A little behind our house to the right, was the house of Mrs. Angeline Lobo . She was the younger sister of your Leola’s maternal grandmother, Lily Pinto-Coelho. Her daughter, Olive was a pretty young girl. Olive now married to Mr Vincent Pinto, lives in Ghatkopar with her eldest son. When we lived in Valencia, the other members who lived in Mrs. Lobo's house were Jerry, her eldest son, who had turned blind, and two younger sons: Reggie and Harry. Reggie has died. I remember, Leola’s grandmother, Mrs. Lily Coelho come to visit her sister. Once her aunt, Winnie came, before she got married. I must have been 12 or 13 years old. Winnie is Kittu, Bina, and Jude's mother. Violet, when she was small came with her mother, Theodora who was the stepsister of my mother in law, Anne, as well as first cousin of my mother from her maternal side and at that time, we children were silly. Violet's mother told us that she was my mother's niece. In Konkani, a similar sounding word, means conjee water. When we made fun of Violet, who was may be 4 years old, she started to cry, and that surprised us. We have come a long way from that day.
In and around Our Parish Church
Our parish church, of St. Vincent de Ferrer was not yet built in 1946 we used to have masses in a house on the right side of present Church compound. There used to be a small chapel at the entrance of the road which forked the left road leading to our house and the right road leading to Archie and Mabel's[1] house and the plot at the back, at a higher level was earmarked for the new Church. The foundation stone had been laid. At that time Fr. Monthu Menezes , an elderly priest was in charge of the parish. He was born in Coondapur , and was a very good swimmer when he was a young boy. Our first Assistant Parish Priest was Fr. Paul Fernandes , the uncle of Wiveena Fernandes who was Vijaya's classmate. I had joined the Altar Servers Sodality, and at one time, I was the prefect.
When the Church was built, Fr. Paul Fernandes challenged us boys to lay the tiles on the church floor by ourselves. We indeed did it. Then he wanted us to make the playground, but we were tired and then, he brought in to bulldozers, and completed the work. He was a close friend of my cousin, Fr. Frederick Pais, Aunt Lucy’s son.
Walty, Ena and Kenny in 1948
Minna in the Legion of Mary –
Minna joined the legion of Mary, and her best friends in those days was one girl, named Dotty D’Sa sister of Teddy and Claude D’Sa who will again come in our lives in Doha, Qatar in the sixties. Dotty died as a young adult girl. Minna came home one day, and expressed to Mother, that we should say rosary everyday. It was accepted. We had to spread the mat and sit on it and say the rosary. Minna would lead it. What used to happen was, that we would dose off, in the middle of the rosary, and Minna would cry out to mother, complaining that we were going to sleep. Then she would tell her, to leave us alone and say the rosary, and pray for us. She would say the whole rosary kneeling down. Could this be the reason, that God has blessed her in her life?
Minna 1948
Plays and Dramas
In those days I did some acting in konkani dramas, which were enacted on stages erected in the Church compound. Lawrie and Harry, from the Pereira family from Cloister View wrote many of these plays and directed them. Lawrie was in Doha in 1960, and was instrumental in sending me the N.O.C. to come to Qatar in 1960.
Family plays.
My mother too was in the habit of writing small skits for us, and she wrote a small play based on a song she had learnt in Puttur about a bad king of Poland, called Leopold. We acted in it, twice, once in the Jeppu house and played the same skit again in the Valencia house. Our parish priest, Fr. Monthu Menezes was the guest of honour. I took the part of the King Leopold of Poland, and Rinny that of the priest, and Kenny, and Mr. Thomas D'Souza's son (neighbour from the Jeppu house) Jossie were the "Devils" tempting the king. When the king was dying, the devils had to tempt him to take him to hell. Tony was not given a role, as my mother considered him to be a big boy. He had been nursing his own ideas. He was a very funny and humorous boy. He rolled himself in my mother's black saree, and jumped on to the stage which was the portico of our Valencia house, and started such hilarious "tempting" as the "Chief Devil, Lucifer" and went on teasing me, and I could not stop laughing, and begged him to go. Tony today is living in Bangalore.
Rice Fields.
The Government passed a law on mortgages after independence possibly between 1948 and 1949, which permitted us to redeem them. My grandfather had mortgaged some rice fields to one of my uncles. Since he did not make a will, the property had to be divided between his five children. Each one's share was Rs. 3,000. Fr. Paul Fernandes advanced this money to my mother, to redeem the fields, and for some time, we got good white rice called “Muscati” rice. I used to go to the fields, which was 9 kilometers away, in a place called Frankpet, where the Capuchins have their Novitiate, on a rented bicycle. I learnt to ride it after we moved to Valencia, and it was my brother in law Gratian Farias who taught me to ride it. He was young at that time, and used to work in the Army in Cawnpore (now called Kanpur). My mother used to pay back Fr. Paul every month Rs. 50 from the money Jossie sent her. She used to manage the house with the left over amount and whatever Evy sent her.
A bitter experience
Once there was no money to pay rent. Since we were going on a Sodality picnic to Nantur, where Fr. Frederick Pais my cousin was the headmaster, my mother asked me to borrow fifteen rupees from him. When I asked him, he remarked how it was not possible for my mother to manage with three children's earning, since Minna too had started to work after 1949. I felt very hurt and started to cry, and with tears flowing down my cheeks ran away saying, “It’s alright, it’s alright". Later on he called me back, after Fr. Paul remonstrated with him, for saying such a thing, when he had not bothered to keep in touch with his Aunt, and told him everything that was happening. He gave me the money, and told me to tell mother, to pay whenever she could. She met him on his sickbed later, when he was being taken to Bombay for treatment. She had not yet repaid him, and said that if she can not give it back to him in this life, she will definitely say a mass for him later, when she can afford to pay. He told her: “Forget about it ‘Estelle Mai” – Aunt Stella, Mai stood for Mamee, means his mother’s brother’s wife. This experience has left a lasting impression on me, and has made me to be sympathetic to people who are less fortunate than me. Fr. Frederick died in 1956 of thrombosis, in Bombay, and is buried in St. Andrews Church, Bandra. Mother said a mass for his soul some time in the sixties.
Ullal River
We used to go swimming in the Ullal River, also called Netravati, which was a kilometer away from our house. Once when I went swimming with my cousin Tony Gonsalves, (my mother's sister's son), who was quite tall, I had a scary experience. He was standing in the river, with water coming up to his chest. I went swimming towards him, and when I tried to stand, the water was close to my mouth. He took be to a shallower place, and told me to be careful. Tony is two years older than I am. We used to go to the riverside to get grass patches to make our cribs, during Christmas time and in the meadows during September to collect flowers, for the novena of Our Lady’s Nativity, as was the custom of the place, children sprinkled flowers at the statue of Mary.
Tiger Dance
My personal experience with children of other religious communities was very little. When we were children in Valencia, we were fascinated by a Hindu custom. For some festival of theirs, they used to make themselves up as tigers, with make up, masks, and paint their bodies with tiger spots. Then as a band of tigers, they would go from house to house and dance to the rhythm of drums, and all of us would come out and watch in great excitement. Our parents would gift them with money.
We also used to have the "harijans" of the locality come and play on certain occasions. Their drumming sounded like modern day rock bands sans glamour. We used to call these people "korgars". They used to cut grass from grasslands and sell it to us, to feed our goats and cows. My mother kept two cows; one had black- and-white patches, and the other a larger cow with red and white patches. The latter cow died when we were in Valencia and the korgars came and took the dead body away, as they used to eat the meat of dead cows. Outside the bathing area, a cow shed was built for the cows and the goats. There were two coconut trees, one close to the cowshed and other a little away from it.
The goat that came as a visitor
Angeline was our servant, when we were in Jeppu house, and a black goat came tagged along with her on her way back from the Kankanady market. We got many young lambs from her. One lamb, which we named "Thelesphor" as, that was the name of the saint, of the day on which the lamb was born was presented to Sr. Joan on the day of her profession some time in 1946. It was greatly loved by us, she gave birth to many lambs, and we also benefited from her milk.
Behind our Church was the Cemetery, which had plenty of grass, so we used to take it and leave it there to graze. But it would find grass greener on the other side of the road in the Protestant cemetery. Once they would go there, their watch man would catch them and take it to the animal prison, and when the goat did not come back, we had to go to the ‘animal detention centre’, and release it, by paying fine. This was a constant nuisance.
Once Teddy Lobo and his brother Frank helped in slaughtering a lamb for one of the feasts. From its stomach, which they dried, they made a drum for us.
15th August, 1947 -
I suddenly got an attack of typhoid. I was down with fever, and Dr. Louis Coelho was called home. He diagnosed it as typhoid and I had to be admitted to the Kankanady hospital. Since we could not afford the paying ward, I was admitted in the General Ward. On our Independence Day, I was in the hospital, and heard the ward boys and nurses marching down the road with their slogans, Jai Hind.
Once I felt better, I tried to get up a walk to the bathroom, and when I touched my feet to the ground, I felt that a huge lump was protruding from my legs. The other patients shouted and told me to call the ward boy. I was in the hospital for a month, and then I was sent home, when I was completely well.
Suffering from Eczema
Around 1947, I was inflicted by a severe bout of eczema, on the lower left leg, just above the ankle. The skin had erupted in rash and was oozing. Mother tried different country remedies, ointments. I did not receive any relief, and it was turning worse. I used to bandage my leg. Later on I had to wear long trousers, to hide the deformity.
Sores and boils also afflicted me. I now know, it was he polluted water from our well, and due to my being allergic to many of these pollutants, especially the road dust, as it would affect the skin, as we used to walk bare foot, to go to school.
I would have to go through this ordeal for many continuous years, until 1954.
Gratian Farias visits us
Gratian joined the Royal Indian Army during the Second World War, and was stationed in different parts of India, and before resuming civilian life, he was in Cawnpore, the present day Kanpur.
He used to spend some days with us, on his way to Puttur, which was his hometown. During these holidays, he used to do plenty of things for us. I remember how he made airplanes, with strips of bamboo, and covered them with colored tissue paper, and lit candles in the middle. We hung it outside our house during Christmas. He also taught me to ride a bicycle, running after me, holding on to the ‘carrier’, which is behind the seat. He too was young at that time, perhaps 20, or 21. I always will remember him with fond memories. I always used to like to hear his stories about his life in Puttur and in the Army. Everyone has experiences that are cherished, and it is unfortunate that people pass away from this world, without our knowing what went on before our time. It is a sign of our poor appreciation of history.
Sr. Joan is transferred to Cuncolim, Goa
Sr. Joan, our eldest sister Lena, as she is known in her convent, was transferred to Goa, and was posted in a place called Cuncolim, south of Margao. She used to make us write letters to her, and it helped us with our English language. We always used to make mistakes with ‘here’ and ‘hear’ or ‘were’ and ‘where’ and at least in my case, it helped me a lot and improved my writing style. Whenever I was lost for words, I used to draw ‘cartoons’ with captions!
Evy joins Air India
We used to call Evy as Evybab. All older people were addressed with the epithet of ‘Bab’ in case of boys, and ‘bai’ in case of girls. Evybab had left Jeppu after our father’s death, and had gone to a place in the south, called Vayitri and worked in the tea estates. Then he joined the southern railways, and after resigning from it went to Bombay and around 1948, joined Air India. He worked in the stores, and lived with Minna and Gratian, who were married in 1950 and were living in Santa Cruz near the Sacred Heart Church.
Kitchen Wall collapses
During one of the rainy seasons, our West Side wall, on which the rain used to beat continuously, collapsed. Just a few minutes before this accident, Minna went to the kitchen to drink some water, and came back to sleep. Suddenly, we heard a noise and the whole wall had come down, and the rubble had fallen on the fireplace.
Next morning, our parish priest, Fr. Monthu Menezes, came to visit us, and sent his masons with the stones and other materials to rebuild our wall. This was the rapport; the priests of the parish had with their parishioners. This beautiful relationship fuelled vocations in our communities, and young boys and girls wanted to dedicate their lives for the betterment of their people, through the medium of their religious beliefs.
Once the wall was built, we had an additional small door in the wall, facing the backyard.
Minna goes to Bombay for work
Minna left Mangalore in 1949 and went to Bombay. Before leaving, she took us, her younger siblings out into the courtyard, and asked us what things we wanted from Bombay? I told her that I wanted a black ‘Waterman’ fountain pen. My father presented the same type to my eldest sister, Lena.
Minna left by train, perhaps with my cousin Gratian, as she was just out of school, and had learnt short hand and typing to prepare herself for the working life. She lived in Byculla with Stannybab, the father of Cornel Nazareth. He was a small boy at that time, and remembers her. Soon after that Minna got married to Gratian, the one who taught me to ride a bike. I will write more about them later. Once I sent Minna a letter with pictures called ‘Ocean of Difficulties’ as after her departure, we had quite a lot of financial problems at home.
Mother gets small pox
After Minna had left, only Kenny, Ena, and myself were with our Mother. She had to do extremely hard work, to look after us, and we never realized how much she was doing for us. We must have given her plenty of trouble. Around this time, our mother contracted the dreadful disease of small pox. Our parish priest, Fr. Menezes immediately got the parishioners inoculated. Mother was transferred to a ‘Quarantine’ – a kind of hospital where they took care of sick people with contagious diseases. I used to visit her everyday and as it was far, our assistant parish priest, made arrangements with a lady nearly, where I could have my meals. But I had not realized how frightened people were so, soon the lady gave excuses, and I had to fend for myself. When I visited my aunt’s houses, I had to stand outside, so that I did not spread contagion.
During this time, my mother’s tongue was affected with sores, and she could not speak properly. She made some sounds, which seemed to say something about ‘MC’, and I was told to meet my mother’s sister Aunt Alice. When I told her what mother had asked, she immediately understood, and laughed at me, and I did not know why, until I grew into a man. She wanted menstrual pads! Today people use worse words, without twitching a facial muscle.
When it was becoming difficult, we sent a telegram to Evybab to come down to help us. One night he reached, and we opened the door. He asked: “How is mother?” And I said, “Did you not know?" He felt shocked. When I said, “She has small pox and is in the quarantine” he was relaxed. From the next day, he was doing the visiting.
At that time, an old lady named Flora, whom my mother called ‘Babli Fula’. She used to work for my paternal grandfather as a young girl, at that time, she was a pretty pink girl, and my grand father called her that name, meaning that she was a Doll. We call a doll ‘bawli’ in konkani. She used to cook for us, even though she was nearly eighty years in age.
I also bought a konkani cookery book, and learnt how to cook meat and fish curries as well as vegetables. Kenny and Ena too gave a helping hand. When mother came back, I showed her my cooking, but I do not think she had regained her appetite.
A stint at making Christmas Sweets –
Once as Christmas was approaching, I asked mother if we would be making sweets. She got upset and told us that since we do not behave ourselves she would not be making them. So saying, she left the house and went away, and we knew she would be visiting Aunt Alice.
We three were alone at home, Kenny, Ena, and myself. We decided to prepare the sweets ourselves. We saw from the cookery book the recipe, which told us to kneed wheat flour to make ‘kalkals’. The kalkals came all right, and we fried them in deep oil as the recipe told us. When they were ready, we felt it would be nice to dip them in sugar syrup. So we read the recipe, took out about 2 kilograms of sugar, put water, and started to boil it. Unfortunately, we did not know how to check the consistency. We did not have patience, so we put the kalkals in the sugar water, and they started to boil and smash. We panicked, and took the kalkals out and spread them on the newspaper to dry and kept them on top of the almirah. We did not get discouraged, we also thought of making Jilebees, and mixed gram flour in water, and got a coconut and opened a hole in it, for the jelebee mix to flow. We were supposed to turn the coconut shell round and round to get the Jelebee shape. Instead because the consistency was not right, they turned out to be flat pancakes. We put these too in the sugar syrup, and kept them for drying. We waited silently for mother to return, and cautiously broach the problem to her. She did not know whether to get angry with us or to laugh. She scolded us for wasting all the ingredients.
Kenny's allergy -
Kenny was allergic to eggs. He could not eat them; neither could eat anything that had it as part of the ingredients. Thus cakes, biscuits etc. were out. During weddings, Kenny would sit between Tony and me. When the cake came around he would take his share and pass it on to me. After that Tony would take his share, and call another waiter, and tell him that Kenny did not receive a cake, and would again take a share for him, and collect it for himself. This was played out for some of our family weddings. We were quite young at that time.
Once when Kenny was sick, and was given an injection it caused a severe allergy. He was completely swollen up and so we rushed him back to the hospital and they gave an antidote and he was fine.
Our School: 1948-1951
1940-41 (1st class); 1941-42 (2nd class); 1942-43 (3rd class); 1943-44 (4th class); 1944-45 (5th class); 1945-46 (Form I); 1946-47 (Form II); 1947-48 (Form III) – Milagres School;
Admission to St. Aloysius' High School –
1948-49 (Form IV); 1949-50 (Form V); 1950-51 (Form VI). On 18th December 1950 I celebrated sixteenth year of my life.
In 1946, I was in the First Form, same as sixth standard, and I was in the Milagres School. I was there till I completed my III Form, which was in March 1949. After that I had to transfer to St. Aloysius' High School which was attached to the College. The Jesuit fathers ran this institution. From IV to VI form, 3 years, our Head Masters was Fr. William Sequeira, Fr. James Coelho, and Fr. Stan Coelho.
Music In school -
We had singing class conducted by one Mr. Noronha, and I used to take part for stage performances. Rinny, (Aunt Alice's son) had taught me a Goan song, of fishermen, and we sang that, and it became very popular among the boys. Our school had a brass band, and my brother Evy told me not to join it, because we were undernourished, and would get tuberculosis. I do not know from where he got his information. He was 8 years older than I was, and was in the College section that year.
Elocution Competitions -
I took part in elocution competition in my V and VI form, and got prizes both years. My V form competition was Mark Anthony's speech from Julius Caesar, and VI form was an essay on Communism written by Harry Pereira, who was a College student that year. My mother tutored me in the art of speech delivery. Even though she had completed only IV form she was well educated for her time. In her time, getting married was more important than education.
My sports experiences
I was only fond of marching, as I had a natural sense of rhythm. However, my muscular co-ordination was not good. I used to get tired after running a little, and while playing cricket, I would get bowled fast, and so I took to "Score marking" with my High School friend, Hubert Nazareth, who was Archie D'Souza's cousin. Their mothers were sisters. I met Hubert later in life in Doha, Qatar where he worked as an accountant for an Oil company. He was married to Pamela, settled down in Bangalore, and recently died. My cousin Tony Gonsalves tried to teach me how to play cricket - we used to play with a flat bat and a tennis ball - but somehow or other, I could not get it at all.
In athletics I was equally bad. Once I had to do a high jump. The height was may be 2 or 2½ feet. Yet as soon as I came close, I would freeze, and ultimately the Physical Training teacher, Mr. Alexander Rasquinha had to throw me out. My marching teacher was a man called Mr. Mark Pais.
Perhaps, the underlying causes were in my eyesight, which failed only when I was 23 years old. On annual sports days, sugar cane was distributed to the students, and that was the only incentive to come to the sports day. I took part in 200m races and relay races. I also took part in volleyball, and softball, which was introduced, in the final year of my high school.
Some funny incidents
I was always poor in the Kannada language. I would hardly get 35 passing marks. In 1949 Hindi was offered, and I took it. My first Kannada teacher, Mr. Krishna Rao was a professor who wrote Kannada textbooks. It was my first day in the school. He asked a question, and I stood up but did not know the answer. I saw him looking at me, but another boy to my right too stood up and answered, boys sitting next to me pulled me down, saying, "He is not looking at you, he is squint eyed!" I was saved that day.
My favorite teachers
English
Mr. Salvadore Fernandes , my cousin Grace's husband taught us English. He was a gentle teacher. The best lesson I remember was the spelling of Alice. He said that we made mistakes in receive and belief etc, so the asked us to remember Alice. After L comes I and after C come E.
One Fr. Raymond Tellis, who was stickler in pronunciation, taught us English in V form. He taught us the difference in pronouncing thick and thin.
Science
Mr. Panduranga Pai was our Science teacher. He was very gifted, and dramatized by actions the subject, which he was teaching. I can remember how he taught us about the different mirrors, prisms, crystals etc. I also learnt about the vibrations of a string. At home, I tried tying a galvanized metal string to the two legs of our metal table, and with the aid of two nails, played the music scale, do re me, and I was thrilled.
Music
One gentleman called Jeffry D'Silva tried to teach me music notations, by singing do re me. I got bored with him and then he told me, that if I could get a guitar I could learn fast. The guitar cost Rs. 85, so I asked my mother, how long would it take to make this money, if I stopped drinking coffee. You know we did not have much money in those days. My mother started to cry, because if our properties had not been lost, I might not have had to ask that question at all. She bought for me a mouth organ instead, and I learnt to play it in a short period.
I first favorite song which I like to sing was O My Darling Clementine. I might have been two years old, and since I could not say the words, I used to say "Da" instead of the word Clementine. Later on, as I grew, I learnt quite a few songs from my mother, both in English and Konkani.
Minna gets married – 1951
On 2nd September 1951 Minna and Gratian got married in Gloria Church, Byculla. Mother had gone for the wedding and left the last three of us back in Mangalore. Our neighbour one Anne, an elderly lady, used to come home to sleep with us, and tell us wonderful stories. She was a Tamil married to a Mangalorean, but knew konkani very well.
Gratian and Minna, with Evy at the back. He was working for Air India at this time.
My mother had asked me to distribute the invitation cards, and I had to go to one my father’s cousin’s house. When I entered the house, the daughter opened the door, and I gave the invitation to her, and she was annoyed that the invite was only for her mother and not to her and her brother. I profusely apologized and promised to let my mother know of her indignation. She was the daughter of Mrs. Hedwees Pais , the wife of my father’s cousin, and her name was Mrs. Annie Pais, married to Mr. Urban D’Souza.
Gratian Farias, with the first baby: Christopher, born 5th May.
The final matriculation examination – 1951
After the completion of the VI Form, in 1951 there was a Government supervised examination. It gave us a Secondary School Leaving Certificate in the Madras Presidency. In Bombay it was the Secondary School Certificate.
We were tense. Mabel too appeared for the examination that same year and she shared her notes with me. I had a friend by the name of Gregory Pais , who lived, close by and we learnt together. Gregory left Mangalore and joined the Getty Oil Company in Kuwait, and I lost touch with him. Some of our other classmates were Hubert Nazareth, Louis Vas, Lancelot Colaco, and Arthur Rasquinha. I also had a close friend Alwyn D’Souza with whom I used to come home walking from the school. He used to live in Vas Lane. Louis and Hubert went to the Gulf. Alwyn became a teacher and taught in Manipal. Arthur became a Jesuit, and worked in north India.
The examination came and went. We all passed our exams, and had to make our decision as to what to do next. Some joined the College, and others went to work. Since I could not afford to go to the College, which levied school fees, I decided not to proceed with my education.
At this time, Fr. Paul Fernandes was coaxing Kenny to join the Seminary. I was thinking of joining the Navy, and Tony told me that I would be taken, as I had knock-knees. So I used to practice to spread them out as much as possible.
One day, Kenny came home and said, that Fr. Paul was talking about me joining the Seminary. I thought it was a splendid idea and true to my character, went straight ahead, and filled in the application with the help of Fr. Monthu Menezes, and gave it to him to submit it to the Bishop.
I wrote to Jossy, who discouraged me and told me to work for sometime, and to come to Calcutta. But I was a one-track mind, and did not understand his concerns. He was tired of working for 8 years, and wanted to settle down, but as I was not prepared to relieve him, he had to go on working.
